North Korea’s Deployment in Ukraine: A Parade of Absurdities

5 min readDec 26, 2024

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, and everyone sitting at home wondering, “What the hell is going on in the world?” Let’s talk about North Korea in Ukraine. Because nothing says “modern warfare” quite like troops trained to climb mountains now wandering around Ukrainian fields, dodging drones carrying stuffed animals. It’s like watching a three-ring circus, only sadder and with fewer clowns — unless you count the commanders.

The Battlefield Reality: Where Old Meets Dumb

So here’s the deal. North Korea sent a bunch of their finest — well, finest is a stretch — to fight for Russia in Ukraine. These poor bastards were armed with outdated tactics, delusions of grandeur, and probably a severe vitamin deficiency. And then they were introduced to Ukrainian drones. Oh, drones! The little flying nightmares that don’t just spy on you but can ruin your day with pinpoint precision.

Drone Warfare: The Buzzkill

Picture this: a bunch of North Korean soldiers marching in a straight line across open fields. It’s like they’re reenacting a military parade, except this isn’t Pyongyang, and nobody’s applauding. Ukrainian drone operators see this and think, “Wow, they’re really making it easy for us today!” Even the most inexperienced drone pilots are out here wiping out entire formations, like a kid finally figuring out how to beat a video game level.

And when the North Koreans finally realized drones were a problem, what did they do? They tried listening for buzzing sounds. Listening! Against flying robots! That’s like trying to fight a hurricane with an umbrella. But hey, it’s not their fault. Nobody told them they’d be fighting the future armed with strategies from the past.

The Psychological Sh*tshow

Ukrainians, being the clever devils they are, decided to spice things up by attaching stuffed Christmas toys to drones. Yes, you heard me. Nothing says “Merry Christmas” like a flying reindeer that explodes. And the North Koreans? They panicked. They wasted precious seconds trying to figure out why a plush penguin was coming at them before realizing — too late — that it wasn’t there to spread holiday cheer.

Strategic Implications: A Masterclass in Poor Planning

Now, let’s talk about what this means for Russia. Spoiler alert: it’s not good.

Proxy Wars: The Lazy Man’s Strategy

When your own army is running out of people willing to die for your nonsense, what do you do? You outsource! Enter North Korea, a country so desperate for attention they’re sending their soldiers halfway across the world to get blown up by drones. For Russia, this isn’t just a bad look; it’s a neon sign flashing, “We’re out of ideas!”

Obsolescence: The Gift That Keeps on Taking

The North Koreans’ failures highlight one thing: you can’t fight a modern war with yesterday’s playbook. Their tactics are so outdated they make rotary phones look cutting-edge. This isn’t just a military issue; it’s a metaphor for authoritarian regimes everywhere. When you’re too busy glorifying the past, you’re not ready for the future.

Geopolitical Fallout: The Domino Effect of Dumb Decisions

This whole fiasco isn’t just screwing up the battlefield; it’s shaking up the geopolitical landscape.

Regional Woes

North Korea’s little escapade has neighboring countries like South Korea and Japan saying, “Oh great, what are these lunatics up to now?” It’s like finding out your weird neighbor bought a tank — you’re not panicking yet, but you’re keeping an eye on them.

Russia’s Reputation: Down the Toilet

Relying on North Korea is like hiring a clown to do your taxes. It’s a desperate move, and everyone knows it. Even China is probably looking at Russia like, “You sure about this?”

Lessons in Modern Warfare: Adapt or Die

The Ukrainian conflict is a classroom, and the North Koreans are failing every subject.

Adaptability: The Thing They Forgot

Modern warfare demands flexibility, creativity, and — here’s a shocker — basic competence. North Korea’s rigid, outdated strategies make them sitting ducks. You can’t win a tech-driven war by marching in straight lines and hoping for the best.

The Power of Trolling

Let’s give Ukraine some credit. They’re not just winning battles; they’re winning the meme war. Turning drones into flying Christmas decorations isn’t just effective; it’s hilarious. And in a world this bleak, a little humor goes a long way.

Conclusion: The Circus Rolls On

So what’s the takeaway here? North Korea in Ukraine is a tragicomic spectacle, a reminder of what happens when outdated regimes try to play in a world they don’t understand. It’s a clash of modernity versus isolationism, technology versus tradition, and — let’s be honest — smart versus stupid. For Ukraine, it’s another notch in their belt. For Russia and North Korea, it’s a masterclass in how not to wage war. And for the rest of us? It’s a front-row seat to the absurdity of it all.

If you’re enjoying the content on my blog and would like to dive deeper into exclusive insights, I invite you to check out my Patreon page. It’s a space where you can support my work and get access to behind-the-scenes articles, in-depth analyses, and more. Your support helps me keep creating high-quality content and allows me to explore even more exciting topics. Visit [patreon.com/ChristianBaghai](https://www.patreon.com/ChristianBaghai) and join the community today! Thank you for being a part of this journey!

Christian Baghai | Patreon

Decoding Neural Networks: Why Your Brain’s Not the Only Thing With Bugs | Patreon

Delving into Function Approximation: Neural Networks and Beyond | Patreon

The Bayrou Government Circus: A PsyOps Breakdown | Patreon

The Barnier Government Collapse and the Narrative Circus | Patreon

How Cults Like Nxivm Operate: A Deeper Dive into Control, Manipulation, and Subjugation | Patreon

U-2 “Dragon Lady”: Spying the World While We Snooze | Patreon

The Sinking of Ursa Major: When Logistics Go Belly-Up | Patreon

Beyond the Crashes: Boeing 737 MAX Tragedies | Patreon

Russia’s Great Mediterranean Getaway: The Tartus Tap-Out | Patreon

Exploring Adaptive Trial Designs: How TITE-BOIN and BOIN-COMB Make Dose Escalation Less of a Circus | Patreon

Inflation and Economic Communication: The Long-Term Focus of Central Banks vs. Media’s Short-Term Lens | Patreon