France Is Now a Compiler, and You’re Just a Syntax Error

5 min readApr 20, 2025

Once upon a time, the government argued with you. Debated. Screwed up in public and tried to justify it.

Now?

It compiles.

The French state has decided that law is no longer something you interpret — it’s something you run. Like code. Like a program. Like a Kafkaesque Python script written by a bureaucratic demon with a computer science degree and zero sense of humor.

Welcome to Mlang — France’s new way of saying, “Shut up and submit.”

I. The Law Is Now a Function, and You’re the Goddamn Input

You think the state still listens? Still weighs nuance? Still gives a damn?

Not anymore. France rebuilt its tax system using a compiler — because nothing says “public service” like replacing human judgment with a stack trace.

This new tool, Mlang, turns every tax clause into code. Not metaphorically. Literally.

You’re not a person anymore. You’re an argument in a function called calc_tax().

You don’t get due process — you get debugged.

You don’t get fairness — you get formatted.

And if your life doesn’t fit the spec? Tough. The machine throws a TypeError and moves on.

II. Ambiguity? Sorry, That’s Not in the Schema

Democracy used to be messy. That was the point. You showed up with your gray areas, your sad stories, your edge cases — and someone listened.

But Mlang doesn’t do ambiguity. Mlang does logic gates.

If you’re in the system: you pay.
If you’re not in the system: you don’t exist.

No more loopholes. No more “context.” No more “my situation is different.”

If it can’t be modeled, it can’t be taxed.
And if it can’t be taxed, it gets ignored.

This isn’t simplification — this is epistemic genocide.

III. Meet the New Sovereign: A God Made of Functions

Hobbes gave us the Leviathan — a sovereign made of people.

France gives us Mlang — a sovereign made of pure math.

It doesn’t sleep. It doesn’t cry. It doesn’t even know you’re alive.

It just executes.

You can’t beg it.
You can’t delay it.
You can’t even piss it off — it doesn’t care enough to hate you.

This is post-human justice.
Your social contract is now written in a domain-specific language and hosted on a server somewhere in Bercy.

IV. Digital Obedience: Designed for Maximum Submission

You think the front-end was built to help you? No. It was built to train you.

Every button. Every popup. Every soft, blue tooltip — it’s not for clarity. It’s for compliance.

This is state-sponsored UX mind control.

You don’t decide. You’re nudged.

Into honesty.
Into consistency.
Into a perfectly predictable little statistical blip in a CSV file.

Congratulations, you’re now a well-behaved variable.

V. France Wants to Sell You Governance-as-a-Service

This isn’t just about French taxes. This is a testbed.

Because once you’ve coded your laws and built the compiler, why not export it?

Want a cheap, scalable way to control a population? Deploy Mlang.
Want to govern without the mess of actual governing? Deploy Mlang.
Want to colonize digitally instead of militarily? Deploy. Mlang.

This is imperialism with version control.

No more boots. Just schemas and endpoints and 24/7 server uptime.

VI. Resistance Doesn’t Look Like It Used To

You can’t resist this with a Molotov cocktail.
You resist this by asking questions like:

Who wrote the schema?
Who sets the defaults?
What happens if your data is incomplete?
What happens when NULL = go directly to jail?

The new battlefield isn’t in the streets.
It’s in the architecture of legality.

Resist the default. Corrupt the input. Trigger the exception.

Because otherwise, you’re not resisting — you’re just running on someone else’s framework.

VII. Exit Code: Democracy

You don’t live in a republic anymore.

You live in a runtime.

Your rights are a data structure. Your agency is a boolean.
Your life is a process waiting to be garbage collected.

You don’t get an appeal.
You get:

exit(code=0)

No errors. No warnings. Just silence.
And then… nothing.

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