A Breakdown of Macron’s Body Language vs. Trump: A Power Showdown

6 min readFeb 25, 2025

Alright, folks, let’s break this down like it’s a late-night rant about the absurdity of human behavior. Macron and Trump’s body language? It’s a goddamn power play wrapped in a diplomatic handshake, seasoned with a sprinkle of passive-aggressive thigh touches. You ever watch two dogs sniff each other’s asses, trying to figure out who’s alpha? Yeah, that’s what we got here.

1. The Handshake Wars: The Battle of the Clenched Fists

Trump’s handshakes aren’t greetings; they’re dominance rituals. The man shakes hands like he’s trying to rip your soul out through your wrist. Macron, though? He came prepared.

Key Moves:

🖕 Grip Strength Showdown: Macron ain’t getting yanked around like some intern at Mar-a-Lago. No, sir. He locks in with an iron grip, making sure Trump doesn’t pull one of those awkward, off-balance, “Look who’s in charge” moves.

🖕 Two-Hand Special: Macron’s got both hands in the mix, like he’s restraining a toddler who just found a box of crayons and a white couch. The left-hand-over technique? That’s Macron saying, “Yeah, I see your power move, and I raise you one.”

🖕 The Endurance Test: Trump usually decides when a handshake ends, but Macron? Nope. He hangs on just as long as needed, making sure the whole thing turns into an uncomfortable, sweaty test of wills.

2. The Art of Subtle Power Moves (a.k.a. Touching Without Groping)

In diplomacy, touching someone isn’t just about connection — it’s about control. Macron knows this and executes what I like to call the “nonverbal smackdown.”

Key Observations:

🖕 Forearm Grabs: Macron ain’t just gonna sit there and take Trump’s nonsense. He interrupts the flow with a casual, almost fatherly forearm grab, like, “Alright, Donny, let’s not get ahead of ourselves.”

🖕 The Back Pat Power Scale: Ever notice how the guy doing the patting is usually the one in charge? Macron strategically places his hand high on Trump’s back, just low enough to be friendly, but high enough to say, “Yeah, I got this.”

🖕 Thigh Contact (Yeah, That Happened): At one point, Macron actually touches Trump’s thigh. Now, if you’re grabbing a man’s thigh mid-conversation, one of two things is happening: you’re either really close, or you’re making a goddamn point. Macron was making a point — a physical “Let’s keep it real here” moment, right when Trump started rambling about Europe’s role in Ukraine.

3. Macron’s Face Says What His Mouth Won’t

A politician’s face is like a poker hand: full of tells. And Macron? Oh, his face was a symphony of controlled skepticism.

Key Observations:

🖕 Tight-Lipped Smile: You ever smile at someone while thinking, “You absolute moron”? That’s Macron every time Trump talks. It’s the “I’m humoring you, but let’s move on” expression.

🖕 Eyebrow Raises of Skepticism: You say some dumb shit, and Macron’s eyebrows immediately question your life choices. Trump says something about NATO? Eyebrows go up.

🖕 Head Tilts: In normal conversation, a slight head tilt means “I’m listening”. Macron tilts his head just enough to say, “I hear you, and I’m internally judging every word.”

4. The Personal Space Chess Game

Body language is all about who’s in control of the space. And Macron? He’s playing five-dimensional chess while Trump is out here playing Connect Four.

Key Moves:

🖕 Closing In on Trump: Macron moves in just enough to invade Trump’s bubble, making the big guy a little uncomfortable. It’s a silent power move.

🖕 Holding His Ground: Trump loves his wide-open stance, all about power projection. Macron? He doesn’t flinch, keeps his posture upright, and never physically retreats.

🖕 The Classic “Lean In, Lean Out” Trick: Macron shifts toward Trump to draw him in, then leans back just enough to make Trump overcommit. It’s like making someone chase a conversation without them realizing it.

5. Macron’s Jedi-Level Verbal & Nonverbal Syncing

A true master of body language doesn’t just react — he controls the tempo. Macron runs this like a seasoned stand-up comic waiting for the perfect punchline.

Key Techniques:

🖕 Pause, Let Him Sweat: Macron takes his time before responding, forcing Trump to sit in his own words for a second. Uncomfortable silences are a weapon.

🖕 Mirroring (When It Helps), Mismatching (When It’s Fun): When Macron agrees, he subtly mirrors Trump’s movements (a classic rapport-building trick). But when he wants control, he mismatches, slowing his speech and gestures to throw Trump off balance.

🖕 Restrained Hand Gestures vs. Trump’s Chaos Hands: Trump’s hands are everywhere — pointing, waving, chopping air like he’s trying to fight off invisible bees. Macron? Measured, controlled gestures. That’s how you project confidence without looking unhinged.

Final Verdict: Macron is Playing Chess, Trump is Playing “Whose Hand is Bigger”

Macron didn’t just defend himself in this meeting — he outmaneuvered Trump without saying a word. He used:
✅ Handshakes that neutralized Trump’s usual dominance bullshit
✅ Touch as a tactical correction tool (forearm, thigh, back-pats — oh my!)
✅ Facial expressions that screamed “I’m tolerating you”
✅ Body positioning that controlled the flow of conversation
✅ Strategic pauses and tempo shifts that made Trump dance to his rhythm

In the end, Macron didn’t **just meet Trump’s dominance — he redirected it. And that, folks, is how you handle an ego the size of a blimp without even raising your voice. Now, if only we could get them both in a room with a behavioral psychologist and some whiskey, we’d get the real show.

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